In Which I Demonstrate My Deeply Intimidating Nature

We've always had bears around our place, but last spring a mama with three (3!) cubs was hanging around a whole lot. I think we're seeing so much action right now because those cubs are grown up and exploring. We've had a lot of luck with firecrackers and a slingshot (I like scaring them away without causing any harm), but it's a two person job to light/load the firecracker and fling it before it explodes.

So Emile and the kids were out of town last week and I had heard a lot of suspicious noises outside, but it was never close enough to the house to worry me. Finally, on Sunday night, the noises were much closer and I thought a bear was tearing up our shed. It was close enough that I got a good look at it then flung firecrackers, clapped my hands, shouted and generally tried to make an auditory nuisance of myself. It really didn't care. At all.

At this point, I decided retreat was perhaps the finest part of valour so I went inside and even decided to lock the doors since a bear that unfazed around humans (you know, the really tough-looking, intimidating types like me) might just decide to come through a sliding glass door into the kitchen for a snack. In retrospect, I realize a lock probably wouldn't stop it if it decided to come in, but I wasn't thinking particularly clearly at that point.

 

All was quieter for a few minutes, but then the noises started up again and I decided I'd give this whole menacing gig one last try. I went back out onto the porch, pulling the door shut with nary a second thought... until I heard the lock click behind me. At this point, I was outside with no flashlight, chainsaw, axe, or any other useful implement of self-defense. Heck, I wasn't even wearing pants since the bear sounds had pulled me out of bed. The bear was making lots of loud thrashing noises, but I could only faintly see where it was because it was Dark. Some of those thrashing noises sounded distinctly like charging to my adrenaline-addled brain.

I had to go closer to the bear to get off the porch, then headed for a kitchen window. I put a thumb-sized hole in the screen so I could pull it out, then was very relieved to discover that the window was not locked. It was, however, at neck height and only opened about 18 inches. In what can only be described as a masterful feat of ninja-like reflexes and superhuman upper body strength, I pulled myself into the kitchen, at which point I decided the bear could do whatever the heck it wanted as long as it stayed outside. I'm pretty sure I was locked outside for all of about 20 seconds. Twenty very long seconds.

It turns out that whatever (valiant and purely related to my exhibition of graceful physicality-- I'm pretty sure "gazelle-like" applies here) noise I was making during my retreat was the last straw for the bear. Once inside, I caught it trundling away in the flashlight's beam. I'm going to go ahead and assume that my defensive display has thoroughly chastened it and we won't be seeing it again any time soon.

Of Tricks, Treats and Batiks

Lest anyone think that we forgot Halloween this year, fear not!

This year, Finn was a Minecraft piggy and Larkin was Katara, from the fantastic animated series Avatar: The Last Airbender. And, dang it, I have to include one of the back of Larkin's head because that hairstyle was not easy!

Emile enjoyed making the pig head, but next year we really want to help Finn figure out a costume that does not obstruct his vision... he had a great time, but it could have been better.

When not preparing these fantastic costumes, we have been working on a batik project using water soluble glue rather than wax (much more kid friendly). We practised on some leftover toddler-sized white shirts from our days of dying past:

 

Larkin enjoyed designing, gluing and painting hers from start to finish (somehow I can't find the picture I'm sure I took of hers). Finn wanted me to do the glue outlines while he painted (or sprayed) on the colour (those lizards are his handiwork).

IKR? SMH...

I can't remember what amusing incident sparked this.

Finn: LOL
Me: Do you know what that means?
Larkin: Laughing out loud! OMG!
Me: And that is...?
Finn [rolling on the floor and giggling]: Oh. My. God.
Me: I think you mean ROFL. Do you know that one?
Finn: ... ruffle your tail feathers?
Me: Yeah, pretty much.

Many Happy Returns

Apparently, I have been so swept up in the living of life that I've been lapse in recording it. Ah well. This will read much like a travel log, since that is how we have been spending a great deal of our time.

In August, we put our passports to good use (after being told by the border patrol that we really ought to take the time to sign them... whoops) and spent a week with my family by the Shuswap lake in B.C. It was wonderful to connect with family I haven't seen in many years, most of whom had never met Larkin and Finn.

We were suitably wowed by the spread at Auntie Barb and Uncle Don B.'s annual fish feed and wild game dinners, the kids went on countless tubing rides courtesy of infinitely patient cousin Ken, I experienced the daunting nightly Canadian happy hours for the first time as a card-carrying adult, Jim and I hiked through some pretty awesome nearby alpine meadows, we took a day trip to Salmon Arm and drove by what used to be my grandparents' house (sniff), and the whole trip felt like the perfect backdrop for my Uncle Don L.'s memorial service.

Finn still (seemingly at random) reminisces about his time on the lake with Ken and how he and Uncle Don B. calculated that he must be one quarter Canadian. Larkin was especially thrilled to get in a whole week of water play, with the bonus of similarly-aged cousin Katey. Emile wishes he had gotten up on those skis at least once.

And this. This is how I remember childhood vacations:

In September, we were off to UROCK, the unschoolers yurt campout at the Oregon coast that has become an annual highlight of Larkin's and Finn's summers. They spent the long weekend playing at the beach, making countless s'mores by the campfire, exploring the wildlife trails through the bush behind our yurt, and reconnecting with friends that they don't get to see nearly as often as they would like.

This year, as an added bonus, Emile and I also got a chance for a short huckleberry-intensive visit with two of our favorite people!

Helen Fey and Danelle had recently moved to the area and it was so nice to catch up with them again.

In October, Emile had to go down to San Francisco for an all-hands work meeting. Unfortunately (ahem), there was a big sales conference going on at the same time and the only room they were able to find for him was the "Kids Suite" at a swank downtown hotel. After assuring them he could suffer through the accommodation, we decided we might as well all go.

The kids and I went to the Exploratorium, many little art galleries (the stand-outs being Dr. Seuss, an exhibit of photographs of the Beatles, and Picasso), toured Alcatraz, visited the Conservatory of Flowers which had an exhibit on carnivorous plants, and wandered in Golden Gate Park. All while being shocked at how expensive everything in the city was. Then Finn and Larkin went off for two nights with the San Jose cousins and left me to fend for myself in the city for a day. I walked to the City Lights book store (uphill, both ways!) and wandered the Yerba Buena Gardens, then Emile and I went out for a delicious big-city dinner.

It was a fantastic trip, but we were all pretty ready to go home to the forest at the end of the week.

Next week, we're off to Boston (!) to visit Emile's brother, his wife and our (relatively) new niece, Ellory. Then maybe we'll stay home for a few months and work on some of those projects we've been hoping to tackle.

Second Language Acquisition

Ha ha! Just kidding. Pig Latin probably doesn't count, right?

Finn just sort of blew my mind by remarking that "Ebay" is "be" in pig latin. How had I never noticed this before? Perhaps there is more zen to the art of internet auction sales than I realized.

In other (still somewhat deceptive) second language news, Larkin (and Finn to a slightly lesser degree) has been very interested in learning sign language recently. I've been pleased with how much I am able to dredge up from those long ago junior high school years when I attended the local target school for deaf students. My old sign language dictionary has been pulled from bookshelf obscurity and put to good use.

Picture Perfect

This month, we applied for our passports. So this happened:

Emile totally got his serial killer on. Granted, he had a raging sinus infection and trimming the beard just wasn't on the top of his priority list. The rest of us have no excuse.

In totally unrelated photographic news, one night before bed I showed Finn how to reverse the camera on my phone so as to facilitate the taking of selfies. I hesitate to admit in public that I just recently figured this out myself and previously thought other people were just really good at centering themselves in their own pictures.

So this happened:

 You're welcome.

Confucius Say

Tonight, over dinner, we were discussing all the things that Larkin and Finn now do for themselves that they used to need Emile and I for. Specifically, Larkin was explaining why it was sometimes nice to have us read a book even if she could read it herself.

Emile (in his best Buddha voice): Do you not know the essence of the universe, young one?

Larkin (immediately): Quarks?

Emile (losing his sonorous tone in his surprise/confusion): Well, yes, unless you believe the string theorists... but I meant Change, grasshopper!

Larkin: I was pretty sure it was quarks. Unless they've recently discovered something smaller that Jenny doesn't know about yet.

Clearly, philosophical grounding has not been a focus at our house lately.